Habit, daily life, empathy essay
‘Alcohol addiction’,‘Alcoholic dementia’
At the age of 22, before the war, I believed that I could do anything. I left a lot of precious memories I had when I was a child at the age of 22. I couldn’t remember what I did yesterday, or I couldn’t speak properly because my vocabulary was low. Among them, the most important point was the repetition of a vicious cycle in which you habitually search for alcohol whenever there is a difficult task because of your strong will for alcohol.
Looking back now, I can’t even remember what was so hard, but the world I was looking at at the age of 22 was cold and dark. I spent a lot of time drinking without deciding what to do or which direction to go. One day when I couldn’t even think I should cut down or stop drinking, I got a call from a company I had interviewed before asking to come out on Monday.
If I drink alcohol every day while working at a company, I think I will lose even the difficult opportunity, so I asked myself how to quit the alcohol I was looking for habitually. It seems that for the first time, I thought about identity the most. When I pondered what kind of person I am and what kind of person I want to be, I could see a little why I should avoid drinking alcohol.
The next thing we had to do was’improving awareness’. They had to recognize that they were no longer dependent on alcohol. It’s not hard to quit drinking, it’s an easy thing I can do. Changing the way you look at me is a very minor difference, but it guided me in a different direction than before. As if people who don’t drink alcohol don’t even think about drinking alcohol in the things they want to do after work, the difference in perception of me gave a completely different result.
Nevertheless, it was not easy to change the bad habits that had been accumulated and accumulated in an instant. My body, which had been tamed with alcohol, did not let me easily change with all my might. In order not to be shaken by temptations, I began to analyze what variables exist. By consciously recalling the processes that were repeated involuntarily, such as in what situations they found alcohol, who they were drinking with, etc., they prevented them from reaching specific situations in which alcohol came to mind, and reduced meetings with friends who drink together.
When I drank the alcohol I sought every day on weekends, occasional or rarely on weekdays, the cold and dark world finally gave me many gifts. The little self-confidence and courage to be able to achieve, the heart to believe in themselves, and the thoughts of wanting to be someone. It became a process of changing my mind from the days I barely lived to the days I want to live, and I can believe that today is a gift.
Habits have a big influence on how you decide your life direction beyond what you can imagine. Just as an airplane reaches a completely different destination by changing its orbit by just 1 degree, my life that changed my orbit so that I no longer depend on alcohol may not seem so different now, but I am living a much healthier and more positive life after 5 years and 10 years. It is also the power of habit to be able to see the life to come with anticipation rather than anxiety.
It is no exaggeration to say that life is a process of finding me and I live every day repeating myself to become a better person in the end. It is an opportunity to become a gift every day from the moment when you realize what habits you need to leave out of the habits filling your life, even for a moment. How about starting with the little things you can do today? The reason why the stone was cracked and sculpted due to the 11th hammering of the stone mason was because there were attempts of 10 times.
“At first we make habits, but then habits make us”